Reasons For Divorce; What Constitutes Viable Reasons For Thinking About Or Wanting A Divorce?
According to the Center for Disease Control's National Vital Statistics Report of 2002, 50% of first marriages ended in divorce and 60% of remarriages end in divorce. But, the Center for Disease Control also found that 96% of Americans express a personal desire for marriage, and almost three-quarters of Americans believe marriage is a life long commitment. I imagine that there are somewhat similar statistics worldwide.
With these kinds of statistics, its easy to see how complex it can be when people think they want a divorce, they have difficulty identifying how a truly viable divorce reason might be defined. Wanting happiness through marriage and wrestling with what may seem an inevitable outcome (a divorce), can be emotionally and mentally challenging. After all, it is human nature to want to feel nurtured and secure, no matter where you live!
So, if you're thinking about getting a divorce, what are truly valid reasons for actually getting a divorce?
Each government has different laws defining the difference between 'fault' and 'no-fault' divorce reasons that have enough merit that allow for the divorce to be granted. While it makes sense for you to keep this in mind when deciding whether or not to get a divorce because there may be financial considerations to think of, you should first focus on defining your own emotional or "personal" divorce reasons, regardless of what the local governing body says.
If you ask 100 people how they define viable reasons for wanting a divorce, you'll most likely get 100 different answers because they'll answer you from their perspective, not yours. Sure, there may be similarities to the way you feel in some of those answers about 'real' divorce reasons, you may even agree with some. But, the real answers to this question can only come from you. You have to figure out what reason or reasons would be viable in your mind in order to actually go through your decision about getting a divorce or staying married.
Some reasons that people give for getting a divorce, or wanting a divorce, are purely selfish and have no substance. An example of a reason for wanting a divorce that has no substance is not liking the fact that your spouse has constant unfounded jealousy. There is a deeper problem that exists here, and in the case of this example, it could be that the spouse who constantly feels jealousy has a confidence problem or some sort of 'fear of loss'. Whatever the case, the divorce reason in this example clearly isn't viable and should relatively easy to fix.
Often times when people give 'surface' or flimsy reasons for wanting a divorce, they really have much deeper feelings about something and they're just using the shallow divorce reason as an avoidance of some kind. Or, they give these 'foundation-less' reasons for wanting a divorce because they actually aren't aware that there are other deeper rooted reasons that are the cause of the way they feel now.
Common reasons that cause people to think about or want to get a divorce:
*Couple has conflicting personal beliefs
*Couple's marital satisfaction decreases
*Desertion
*Adultery
*Cruel treatment
*Bigamy
*Imprisonment
*Spousal Indignities
*Institutionalization
*Irretrievable Breakdown of some kind
Of course, you should add your own reasons to the list for wanting a divorce, better yet, make your own list of what may be 'valid' reasons. Solid divorce reasons for wanting or going through a divorce usually come from some sort of occurrence, behavioral pattern, and/or change in the viewpoint of the marriage itself.
In order to really make a smart divorce decision, you should first list the reasons that you have for wanting a divorce, then examine those divorce reasons for true viability. Then come back to it that list in a day or so. Chances are you will be able to scratch a few of those reasons for wanting a divorce off the list because they were identified purely from an emotional viewpoint rather than logic.
If you are thinking about getting a divorce, and haven't clearly identified what reasons you have for feeling the way you do, you'll be doing yourself a 'dis-service' if you act without carefully examining the viability each designated divorce reason. Everyone has their own reasons for wanting a divorce, make sure that you are certain that your reasons are truthfully viable to you before you act on them.
Author of "A Practical Guide To Deciding Whether Or Not To Get A Divorce", the eBook recommended by counselors to their clients. Proven "Actions Items" to help you decide!
Deciding on Divorce
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Latest News
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 Palm Beach Post (blog) | Miami Dolphins talking points: Dolphins bring in another QB, headed to divorce ... Palm Beach Post (blog) Without knowing the specifics, the Dolphins and White could be headed toward divorce. Why? Because the Dolphins already have three quarterbacks in camp ... |
Splitting custody of Fido?; Judge orders just that in divorce ABC2 News Should a dog be treated like a child when couples divorce? Watch the full story by clicking the video linked to this article. Gut Check: Doggie Custody? |
 Telegraph.co.uk | Divorce ruling set to transform 'big money' cases Financial Times Estranged wives in “big money” divorce cases will be barred from using secretly obtained documents in an attempt to ... Skullduggery in divorce proceedings Landmark ruling on divorce cases Tchenguiz brothers lose papers battle in divorce dispute |
 New York Post | LI Judge: business man in divorce trial 'despicable' New York Post On the eve of his divorce trial, Dominick Cusumano, a home improvement company president, volunteered the information to the IRS that he did not report the ... NY Judge Calls Husband's Pre-Divorce Filing of Back Taxes 'Despicable' Judge slams $1.7M 'scam' ex |
 Sassyqarla Entertainment Blog Site | Tiger Woods And Elin Nordegren-Woods: Before Divorce Comes Marriage Rumor Sassyqarla Entertainment Blog Site Now, ace womanizer Tiger Woods is finally done playing games with one of his damsels. He's actually taking it to the next level. And who else could that be ... |
 al.com (blog) | Smith divorce papers cite affair Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog) Preston Smith, the Republican candidate, once had an extramarital affair with a woman he hired to work in his Senate office, according to divorce court ... Smith Campaign Getting Attacked on `Values` Smith Issues Statement about `Affair with Staffer` Republican attorney general candidate in Georgia admits affair with former staffer |
Here comes the 'Divorce Court' judge: Lynn Toler Fort Worth Star Telegram When Judge Lynn Toler brings her event "Divorce Court: An Afternoon With Lynn Toler" to Dallas this weekend, she plans to bring some clips ... |
The Un-Divorced New York Times And at 58, he sees no reason to divorce. Their children have grown and left home. He asked himself: Why bring in a bunch of lawyers? ... |
Resources
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Save Your Relationship, Save Your Marriage, Stop Your Divorce, Stop Your Break Ups, Broken Heart Adv
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StopMarriageDivorce.com - Stop Divorce Today
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Divorce Decision-Decide if Divorce is the answer
Breakthrough resource to help women who are unhappy in marriage make a careful decision.
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Divorce Books, Child Support and Custody Information
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