Empty Nest Syndrome
Paula's last child had just gone off to college and Paula was struggling with a deep inner emptiness. While she knew this day was coming, she was not really prepared for the intense hollowness that welled up within. After all, she had a life of her own. Her work as an occupational therapist, which she had gone back to after all her three children were in school, was fulfilling to her. She was fortunate in having been able to schedule her time to be home when her children came home from school so she could take them to their various activities. Paula had been a loving and devoted mother and was very proud of her children. She had been looking forward to this time for herself and her husband, but now that it was here, Paula felt lost.
It's not that she didn't have things she loved to do. She was a talented and athletic woman and had many creative and physical activities that she enjoyed. She and her husband had a good relationship with a wide circle of friends they often spent social time with. So, why this emptiness?
Paula sought my help when she realized that she was slipping into depression.
"I just can't figure out what's wrong," she stated in our first session together. "My marriage is fine, my work is fine, I have lots of friends and activities I enjoy. I don't understand why I'm feeling so unhappy."
I asked Paula to tune inside to the unhappy part of her and let this part of her speak. "Imagine that the unhappy part of you is a child within. There is some very good reason this inner child is feeling so unhappy, and you need to ask her. Start out with asking her how she feels about you as the inner parent."
Paula asked and was quite surprised at the answer. "You never want to know how I feel," her inner child complained. "You always wanted to know how the children felt, and you were always there for their feelings, but not for mine. You spend your time in ways you think make us happy, but you never ask me about it. While the kids were growing up, you were able to ignore my sadness, but you can't ignore me anymore. I'm here, and I need you to pay attention to me."
"I don't get this," said Paula, "What does this unhappy part of me want me to do?"
"Ask her," I stated.
Paula asked and the answer came. "Our work and all our activities are fine, but I need something deeper. I've been wanting you to open to something spiritual, but you haven't listened to me."
"I have tried going back to church, but that doesn't seem to be doing it for me. This does seem to be some kind of spiritual emptiness, but I don't know what to do about it."
Paula had never taken the time to develop a personal relationship with God. While she believed in a Higher Power, it was something "out there", not something she connected with and brought into her heart and soul. Her soul was missing the sense of deep connection and inner fullness that comes from having a personal relationship with a spirit source of love and guidance, as well as with her own inner feelings. While her children were filling this empty space, she didn't deal with it, but now that they were gone, it was time to face the emptiness that had always been there but had been covered up with mothering.
I asked Paula to close her eyes and imagine a wise and loving spiritual being, perhaps her own highest self, perhaps a relative who had died that she loved, perhaps a religious figure she felt connected with, or an image of a teacher, mentor, or guardian angel. She was able to imagine an angelic Presence that made her feel very loved and safe.
"Now bring the love from this Presence into your heart and then down into the empty place within. Imagine that you are loving the child within in the same way you have loved your children, hearing your inner child's feelings and needs in the same way you did with your children. If you also open to learning with this Presence about what is loving to your inner child, and then take the loving action for yourself, you will start to fill that emptiness within you. Are you willing to try this?"
Paula was very willing to learn to create the deeper connection with Self and with Spirit. She reported to me a few weeks later that she was no longer feeling depressed. Her "empty nest" was now being filled with her inner and spiritual connection.
About The Author
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?" She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or mailto:margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available.
Latest News
is there any correlation between bad parenting... AllHipHop - is it essential for a parent to teach you a thing or two about men or women when it comes to crafting your relationship{mackin} skills and is it possible ... YOU'RE/THAT'S SO GHETTO |
Chief Parenting Extends C-Level Parental Suite to Include Chief ... PR Web (press release), WA - Empowering men and women to become exemplary parents, recognizing those that do and honoring them with their earned executive level parenting titles, ... |
The Intersect Between Reporting and Parenting Tecumseh Herald, MI - Sometimes, though, circumstances make it so that all I can do is be the parent. Take last night's band concert in Britton. Just take yesterday in general, ... |
Spencer Bachus Approves of Nanny State, Opposes Parenting Casino Gambling Web, FL - Long time supporter of legalization and regulation of all forms of online gambling, Gordon Price, said, "Instead of teaching parents how to filter the ... |
![]() Examiner.com | Parenting Tip of the Day: Lay off the sarcasm Examiner.com - by Terreece Clarke, Parenting Examiner I'm a sarcastic human being. I'm like Ralphie's dad from A Christmas Story, he dabbled in obsenities, ... |
Free parenting workshop today at Second Bethlehem Baptist Church ... Alexandria Town Talk, LA - A free parenting workshop will be held today, Dec. 4, at 6 pm at Second Bethlehem Baptist Church located at 1910 Harris Street Alexandria. ... |
![]() TheTimes | Make holidays brighter for children of incarcerated parents, she says TheTimes, OR - By Kristen Forbes A Parenting Inside Out class graduate poses with her son. She and her two children will be gift recipients at the Center for Family ... |
![]() The Plain Dealer - cleveland.com | The Family Tree Baltimore Sun, United States - Volunteers older than 21 are needed as parent educators in North and South Counties to co-teach a Positive Parenting Course in 12-week intervals. ... Statistics about children in crisis |
Media Mogul Tommy Mottola Finds New Star in EEBEE MarketWatch - We're confident that co-parenting this business with Tommy Mottola will bring us to the next level of success." "We are delighted to partner with EVERY BABY ... |
Or Ami addresses parenting issues Agoura Hills Acorn, CA - Congregation Or Ami's Center for Jewish Parenting is currently offering a series of lectures that cover a wide range of parenting issues. ... |
Resources
-
Parents - The Greatest Parenting Secret in 50 Years!
Raising Kids With Life Skills makes both Parenting and growing up easier to do.
-
Parenting TOOLS to design the family of your dreams! What does your dream family look like?
Powerful tools for Parenting, anger management, and creative blocks!
-
Toddler Activities - Preschooler Activities - Children's Activities - Family Fun
Toddler activities to entertain and educate your toddler. 52 toddler activities and more! FREE newsletter with toddler activities, toddler play ideas and toddler crafts, relevant websites, Parenting quotes and more!
-
Many of our Ebooks are 100% FREE!
Download ebooks on website marketing, Parenting, ebook publishing and more.
-
Child behavior management without anger with this upbeat and effective Parenting tool.
An upbeat, fun Parenting tool for parents wishing to manage their behavior challenged kids.
-
More Fun Less Work Parenting Method - Increase Your Child's Emotional Intelligence
Fun Parenting method - teach your child emotional intelligence using curiosity and simple rules. Increase kid
-
Many of our Ebooks are 100% FREE!
Download ebooks on website marketing, Parenting, ebook publishing and more.
-
teach your baby how to read,early reading,Parenting advice,reading baby,toddler learning activity
You can teach your baby how to read. Reading early is possible.Your growing child learns through a cumulative process and targeted toddler learning activities. Crucial Parenting advice is key to unlocking your child
-
Practical Parenting Advice - children's behavior problems, child
behaviour problems, FREE parentin
Free Practical Parenting Advice - children
-
Divorce Parenting
Divorce resource for parents. Online seminar. Great tools for learning to help your family navigate the breakup process. Kids, Children, Parents, Family divorce tips and solutions. Powerful Strategies


